Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Hey everyone!!! Great news! My sister inlaw is expecting her 8th child! God is good and adding yet another one of His children to our family. Congratulations Jordan, Jared, Caden, Trinity, Emma, Keirnan and Torin...you'll again be big brothers and sisters! Today is a little bit brighter than my days have been...so very excited for Erin and her little bun in the oven. Ok, I'm getting all baby crazy on this post. I will spare all of you the earfull of obnoxious-ness. :) Hope everyone is having a good day!
Thursday, July 14, 2011
Today has been incredibly difficult. I realized again, I don't see life through the eyes of a typical 20 year old. When left alone for long periods of time, I find myself worrying and wishing some things were different. I have been struggling very much with the desire to start a family. I know this may sound crazy to most but I believe that God has placed in my heart this intense desire to have a baby. At this point in time, I, nor my husband have steady jobs. But I can't fight the urge to want children even though, financially, it seems irresponsible. I truly don't know how to cope with the constant thoughts and longings for a little one. There is a whole lot of Scripture I could post about being patient, but because of the ridiculous hour at which I'm posting this, I will for-go that for tonight. There are certain seasons in life where other things become more important than past things, since last September I have been at this pivital point. Dreaming, hoping, and praying that God will work children into my life soon. I just don't see it happening yet, this dark looming idea has drug me into a state of loneliness...the want to be filled with a tiny blessing inside of me that I will love more than myself is more than I can bare. All I can say is that its in God's timing, He knows. Its tough coming to these terms and today its hard for me to accept. I pray that God will get me through one more day. Matthew 6:24 "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble."